⚠️ Trigger Warning + Disclaimer:
This entry contains real-time experiences of anxiety, panic, and health-related fears, including chest pain, intrusive thoughts, and physical symptoms.
This journal reflects my personal experience and is not medical advice. If you are experiencing severe or concerning symptoms, please seek professional medical care.
March 26, 2026
I thought this was it.
My chest started feeling weird again.
Not pain exactly… just uncomfortable. Enough for me to notice it. And once I notice something in my body, it’s over.
I can’t ignore it.
Then my heart rate went up a little.
Nothing crazy, but enough for me to feel it.
And that’s all it takes.
Now I’m thinking—why is it doing that? What triggered it? Am I about to have a heart attack just sitting here?
I tried to distract myself. Tried to keep working.
But my brain was already gone.
Every little beat felt louder. Every sensation felt like proof that something was wrong.
Then I checked my pulse again.
Big mistake.
Because now I’m watching it. Waiting for it to mess up.
And the more I watched, the worse it felt.
I hate that cycle.
Eventually I just sat there and tried to breathe through it.
Because I’ve felt this before.
Same exact feeling.
And every single time… nothing happens.
It slowly calmed down.
My chest relaxed. My heart slowed.
And once again, I was left sitting there thinking…
why does it feel so real every time?
Because in that moment…
I really thought this was it.