Anxiety Momster

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Category: Panic disorder

  • 5 Signs of a Silent Panic Attack

    5 Signs of a Silent Panic Attack

    Trigger Warning: This post discusses panic attack symptoms and health anxiety. Please read with care if these topics are triggering for you.

    Disclaimer: I’m not a doctor or mental health professional. This blog is based on research and my own lived experience with anxiety. Always seek professional medical advice if you’re worried about your health.

    When I first started experiencing panic attacks, I thought I knew what they were supposed to look like: racing heart, sweating, maybe hyperventilating. That’s what TV and Google always showed.

    But one day, I found myself dizzy, with chest aches and jaw tension, convinced I was about to have a heart attack. I didn’t feel the “panic” part — no screaming, no obvious breakdown. Just terrifying physical symptoms. Later, I learned this is called a silent panic attack (or sometimes “atypical panic attack”).

    If you’ve ever wondered, “Can you have a panic attack without feeling panicked?” — the answer is yes. And it’s more common than people think.

    🚨 5 Signs of a Silent Panic Attack

    1. Physical Symptoms Without the “Panic” Feeling

    Silent panic attacks can look like health issues. You may feel:

    • Dizziness or lightheadedness
    • Chest tightness or pain
    • Tingling in arms or face
    • Shaking or weakness

    📖 Personal Note: I once rushed to the ER convinced I was having a stroke because my arm felt weak. Everything checked out fine — it was anxiety.

    🔎 Fact: Panic disorder can cause intense physical symptoms even when people don’t recognize they’re panicking【Mayo Clinic†source】.

    2. Feeling Detached or “Not Real”

    Some people describe silent panic attacks as derealization (feeling the world isn’t real) or depersonalization (feeling detached from your own body).

    📖 Personal Note: I’ve had moments where I felt like I was outside my body, watching myself function. It was terrifying, but it passed.

    🔎 Fact: Dissociation is a known symptom of panic attacks, often tied to the body’s “fight or flight” response【National Institute of Mental Health†source】.

    3. Sudden Fear of Losing Control

    Even without racing thoughts, you may get a flash fear like:

    • “I’m about to collapse.”
    • “I can’t control my body.”
    • “Something is seriously wrong.”

    📖 Personal Note: I remember sitting at my desk, heart steady, but suddenly thinking “I’m going to pass out.” The thought came out of nowhere and my body spiraled into tension.

    🔎 Fact: Panic attacks can create an intense fear of losing control, even when nothing dangerous is happening【American Psychological Association†source】.

    4. Gastrointestinal Upset

    Nausea, stomach pain, or sudden urges to use the bathroom can be signs.

    📖 Personal Note: For me, a “silent attack” sometimes starts in my stomach. I’ll feel nauseous, like I’m going to throw up, which spikes my anxiety even more.

    🔎 Fact: The gut-brain connection means anxiety often shows up as stomach issues【Harvard Health Publishing†source】.

    5. Exhaustion After It Passes

    Even if you didn’t feel panicked, the physical toll leaves you drained.

    📖 Personal Note: After one episode where I only felt chest pressure, I needed to lie down for hours. My body felt like I’d run a marathon.

    🔎 Fact: Panic attacks trigger an adrenaline surge, and when it fades, fatigue often sets in【Cleveland Clinic†source】.

    Silent panic attacks are scary because they don’t “look” like panic but they’re real, and they’re part of the anxiety spectrum. If you’ve experienced these symptoms, you’re not alone.

    💜 What helps me: journaling, grounding exercises, and reminding myself: “This is anxiety. It feels scary, but it’s not dangerous.”

    If you’re struggling often with panic or anxiety:
    Please reach out to a therapist, doctor, or counselor. Panic attacks are treatable, and you don’t have to carry this fear forever.

    If you’re ready to take back some calm in your own life:
    👉 Join my Calm Vault a private, subscriber-only section of my blog filled with free anxiety trackers, journal prompts, and self-care tools you won’t find anywhere else.

    Unlock the Calm Vault here

    📌 Sources:

    • Mayo Clinic – Panic attacks and panic disorder: Symptoms & causes
    • National Institute of Mental Health – Anxiety Disorders
    • American Psychological Association – Understanding panic attacks
    • Harvard Health Publishing – The gut-brain connection
    • Cleveland Clinic – Panic disorder overview
  • Why Does Anxiety Show Up in My Body But Not My Mind?

    Why Does Anxiety Show Up in My Body But Not My Mind?

    ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This post discusses anxiety, panic attacks, and physical symptoms that may be sensitive for some readers.

    📌 Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional. Everything shared here combines my personal experience with facts from trusted sources. Please seek medical advice from a licensed professional for your own health concerns.

    One of the most confusing things about anxiety is when your body feels it, but your brain doesn’t. You’re not sitting there panicking. You’re not even thinking scary thoughts. Yet suddenly your chest feels tight, your jaw aches, your heart races, or your stomach flips.

    That’s when the spiral starts: “If I’m not panicking in my head, then this has to be something dangerous, right?”
    I’ve been there more times than I can count.

    I wrote about something similar in “Can You Have a Panic Attack Without Feeling Panicked?” and it turns out, you can. Anxiety doesn’t always look like the movie version of someone hyperventilating with shaking hands. Sometimes, it’s quiet in your head but loud in your body.

    The Science Behind It (Facts First)

    Anxiety doesn’t always start in your thoughts sometimes it shows up in your body first. Here’s why:

    • Fight-or-Flight Response: Even if you don’t feel panicked, your body may detect stress signals (like blood sugar changes, hormones, or muscle tension) and release adrenaline. This causes chest tightness, fast heartbeat, or shaky muscles Harvard Health Publishing.
    • Subconscious Stress: The nervous system can stay activated below your conscious awareness. Studies on stress physiology show the body may remain in “high alert mode” even when you don’t feel mentally stressed American Psychological Association.
    • Physical Symptoms Without Mental Panic: Research published in Dialogues in Clinical Neuroscience explains that anxiety often triggers physical symptoms — gastrointestinal upset, headaches, muscle pain, palpitations — even when people don’t report feeling anxiousDialogues Clin Neurosci, 2002.

    So yes: your body can sound the alarm even when your mind is calm.

    How This Looks in My Life

    For me, it happens like this:

    • I’ll be sitting at work, not even thinking about anxiety, when suddenly my chest feels tender.
    • I’ll be playing with my kids at the park, completely fine mentally, when jaw pain or shoulder tightness shows up out of nowhere.
    • I’ll wake up in the middle of the night, heart pounding, even though I wasn’t dreaming anything scary.

    And of course — my anxious brain kicks in after the fact, whispering: “What if this isn’t anxiety?”

    Why It Happens (The Bridge Between Mind + Body)

    Think of your mind and body as being on the same highway. Sometimes traffic starts at the “thought” exit (worry, what-ifs) and then spills into your body (heart racing, muscle tension). Other times, it’s reversed your body hits the gas first, and your brain catches up later.

    This doesn’t mean you’re “broken” or missing signs. It means your nervous system is hypersensitive, reacting before you even notice.

    How I Cope When My Body Freaks Out but My Mind Is Calm

    Here are a few things I do when anxiety shows up in my body first:

    • Remind myself it’s common. I literally say: “This is anxiety in my body, not danger.”
    • Grounding techniques. I feel my feet on the floor, touch something textured, or name five things I see.
    • Stretching and moving. If my chest or shoulders hurt, stretching helps prove to me it’s tension, not something fatal.
    • Check the pattern. I look back—this symptom has come and gone before. It’s frustrating, but not new.

    I also opened up more about my experience in “Unmedicated but Anxious: My Honest Truth”. That post dives into what it’s like navigating anxiety without depending fully on medication and why these body-first symptoms still show up anyway.

    Final Takeaway

    Yes, anxiety can show up in your body even when your mind feels calm. It’s not a trick, and it’s not you “imagining things.” It’s your nervous system working overtime and it’s been studied and documented.

    You’re not alone, you’re not broken, and your body isn’t betraying you. It’s just anxiety showing up in a different doorway.

    And here’s the truth I remind myself daily: just because my body screams doesn’t mean I’m in danger.

  • Can You Have a Panic Attack Without Feeling Panicked?

    Can You Have a Panic Attack Without Feeling Panicked?

    ⚠️ Trigger Warning:

    This post discusses panic attacks, dissociation, and physical anxiety symptoms. If you’re in a sensitive headspace, read gently and take breaks.

    💬 Disclaimer:

    I’m not a doctor or therapist just a mom who has battled anxiety and panic in ways that don’t always look “textbook.” This is my truth, blended with research and real facts for those of us who feel broken, but aren’t.

    “But I didn’t feel panicked.”

    I’ve said that sentence more times than I can count usually while sitting on the bathroom floor, heart pounding, vision weird, limbs tingling, convinced something was deeply wrong.

    I didn’t feel scared.
    I didn’t feel overwhelmed.
    I didn’t feel panicked.

    And yet… my body was in full-on alarm mode.

    Shaky.
    Hot and cold flashes.
    Tight chest.
    Tingling in my face and hands.
    Detached.
    Like I wasn’t fully in my body.

    What was it then? A stroke? A heart attack? Blood sugar drop? Brain tumor?
    Nope.

    It was a panic attack without the “panic.”

    So… Is That Actually a Thing?

    Yes. It’s called a “silent panic attack” or a “non-anxious panic attack.”

    According to the American Psychological Association, a panic attack is defined by a sudden surge of intense physical discomfort or fear, but the key word is “or.”

    You do not need to feel panicked to be having a panic attack.

    Some people feel:

    • Detached or spaced out (called derealization or depersonalization)
    • Like their body is malfunctioning
    • Like their heart is racing for no reason
    • Numbness or tingling without emotion
    • A sudden sense of doom, but no fear attached to it

    This type of panic is body first, mind second.
    You’re not “freaking out.” You’re shutting down.
    It’s anxiety in disguise and it’s terrifying because it doesn’t look like what you were told it would.

    What It Felt Like for Me

    There was a day I was just sitting at work.
    No stress. No bad thoughts. Just working.

    And then… my right arm tingled. My chest felt “off.” My face flushed. My heart started thudding and the floor felt like it was swaying.

    But emotionally? I felt numb.
    No racing thoughts. No fear. Just a weird fog and the feeling that I was “leaving my body.”

    I honestly thought I was dying but I wasn’t panicking. I wasn’t even crying.
    That’s what made it scarier.

    What Causes This Type of Panic?

    Experts believe these “non-anxious” panic attacks happen when:

    • Your nervous system is already dysregulated
    • You’ve been holding in stress or trauma for too long
    • Your body reacts faster than your brain
    • You have health anxiety, so your fear shows up through symptoms first
    • You’ve numbed out mentally to survive

    How I Manage Silent Panic Attacks Now

    Let’s be clear: I haven’t found a perfect solution. But here’s what helps me:

    • Naming it out loud “This is a panic response. Not a heart attack.”
    • Using cold water on my face or wrists
    • Grounding my body before my brain tries to catch up
    • Tracking symptoms so I know when a pattern is starting
    • Talking to my body like it’s a scared child, not a broken machine

    If you’ve ever said: “I don’t feel scared, but something’s wrong…”

    Please know you’re not crazy. You’re not faking it.
    You’re having a very real response to stress that’s been silenced or buried too long.

    Whether it comes with tears or total blankness panic doesn’t always scream.
    Sometimes, it whispers.
    Sometimes, it hides in your skin.
    But it’s still real. And you still deserve support.

    💜 Take What You Need — Without Judgment:


    ✨ And don’t forget to visit The Calm Vault — my free mental health library full of tools, trackers, and printable support to meet you where you are.

    📂 Access The Calm Vault here

    You deserve calm even if you’re still learning how to feel it.

  • My Smartwatch Fed My Anxiety More Than It Helped

    My Smartwatch Fed My Anxiety More Than It Helped

    My Truth About BP Monitors, Pulse Ox, and Data Overload

    Let me say this first:
    Smart tech is amazing.
    It gives us power, access, data, and awareness we never had before.
    But if you live with anxiety — especially health anxiety — it can also become a trap.

    I’ve worn the smartwatches.
    Used the pulse ox.
    Tracked my blood pressure at home.
    Monitored sleep, steps, stress levels, glucose spikes, and heart rate dips.

    And while all of that can be helpful… it can also feed the fear.

    ⚡ The Blessing Part:

    • My smart watch helped me notice my heart rate patterns during panic
    • My BP monitor taught me that my pressure rises during stress — but also goes back down
    • My oximeter gave me peace during COVID waves when I needed to confirm I was okay
    • My apps helped me track patterns, especially for sugar, iron, and anxiety triggers
    • I’ve been able to show real data to my doctor instead of saying “I just don’t feel right”

    Without this tech, I’d feel blind sometimes.
    But with it? I feel seen. Measurable. Trackable. Explainable.

    Until… I spiral.

    😩 And Then Comes the Curse…

    • Checking my heart rate every 5 minutes because I “felt something”
    • Freaking out over a BP reading that was slightly high after crying
    • Obsessing over a pulse ox drop that was 97% instead of 99%
    • Constantly comparing today’s numbers to yesterday’s and trying to predict danger
    • Googling every result like it’s the end of the world

    Because anxiety doesn’t see data — it sees danger.

    And when smart tech becomes an obsession instead of a tool… it can ruin your peace.

    🧠 Smart Doesn’t Always Mean Safe (Mentally)

    There were days I couldn’t stop checking.
    I’d take my BP four times in an hour.
    Watch my HR on my wrist in real-time like it was a countdown to doom.
    I wasn’t being cautious — I was chasing control.

    And it stole more peace than it gave me.

    💜 What I’m Learning Now

    • Use the tools — but don’t live by them
    • One reading doesn’t mean crisis
    • My body can have spikes, drops, weird rhythms — and still be OK
    • My brain loves patterns, but not all patterns are meaningful
    • Sometimes the healthiest thing I can do… is take the watch off

    Smart tech isn’t the enemy.
    But for someone with anxiety, it has to be used mindfully, not obsessively.

    🖤 If You’re Here Too…

    If you’ve ever sat in silence watching your Fitbit like it holds your fate — I see you.
    If you’ve Googled a 95% oxygen reading like it was a death sentence — me too.
    If you’ve both thanked and hated your gadgets in the same day — you’re not alone.

    You’re not overreacting. You’re trying to feel safe.

    Just remember: You are not your numbers.
    And peace sometimes starts when we look less, not more.

  • What Anxiety Has Stolen From Me — And What I’m Taking Back

    What Anxiety Has Stolen From Me — And What I’m Taking Back

    Trigger Warning: This post discusses anxiety, panic attacks, emotional overwhelm, and personal loss.
    Disclaimer: This post is based on personal experience and is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice.

    🖤 The Truth?

    Anxiety has taken so much from me.

    I don’t say that for pity. I say it because it’s real. It’s honest. And if you’re reading this, maybe you feel it too.

    I’ve lost time — so much time — worrying about things that never happened.
    I’ve missed out on joy because I was too focused on what could go wrong.
    I’ve watched moments pass while I was stuck in my head, spiraling.
    I’ve spent nights awake, heart pounding, body buzzing, afraid of sleep itself.
    I’ve said no to plans I really wanted to say yes to — all because anxiety told me I wasn’t safe.

    😔 What It Stole from Me…

    • Sleep: Long nights of checking my pulse, Googling symptoms, trying to breathe through imaginary danger.
    • Peace: My mind never seemed to shut off. Even in silence, it was loud.
    • Confidence: I started questioning everything I felt. Every pain. Every twitch. Every emotion.
    • Moments with My Kids: I was there, but I wasn’t. I was trapped in a storm while smiling through it.
    • Joy: Even on good days, anxiety made me suspicious of the peace. Like I wasn’t allowed to feel okay for too long.

    It took my presence. It made me feel broken.
    It made me think I’d always be like this.

    💪 But Here’s What I’m Taking Back:

    I’m taking back my power.
    I’m reclaiming my voice.
    I’m choosing to track it, name it, and still live through it.

    No, I’m not magically cured.
    No, I don’t always feel brave.
    But I’ve learned to face it with softness and fight it with truth.

    I breathe when it tells me to panic.
    I speak out loud when it makes me feel crazy.
    I show up for myself, even if it’s messy and tired and trembling.

    And I’ve started to feel little pieces of myself come back.

    🌱 Reclaiming My Life Looks Like:

    • Writing these words. Sharing what I’ve lived.
    • Making tools for others who feel like I do.
    • Taking deep breaths that don’t feel forced.
    • Laughing with my kids and actually feeling it.
    • Saying, “I had a hard day,” without shame.
    • Letting joy in — and letting it stay a while.

    I might not be who I was before anxiety. But I’m building someone even stronger.

    Someone real. Someone healing.

    🖤 If You’ve Lost Yourself to Anxiety Too…

    I see you. I AM you.

    And I want you to know: it’s not too late to get pieces of you back.
    Even if it’s slow. Even if it’s one breath at a time.

    You’re not weak. You’re surviving a war no one else sees.

    And you are worth every moment of peace you’re trying to find.

  • Today Was a High Functioning Anxiety Day—But I Still Showed Up

    Today Was a High Functioning Anxiety Day—But I Still Showed Up

    ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This post discusses health anxiety, panic, and fear around daily tasks.
    📌 Disclaimer: This blog shares personal experiences and is not intended to replace professional medical advice.

    Today was a high functioning anxiety day.

    That means I still did things—I got out of bed, I worked from home, I showered—but it felt like dragging myself through quicksand the whole time.

    I woke up already in panic mode.
    My chest felt off.
    My thoughts were racing.
    And the first thing I did?
    Check my heart rate. Again. And again. And again.

    Scared to Shower, But I Didn’t Want to Be Alone

    Even something as “simple” as a shower felt scary today.
    What if I got lightheaded?
    What if I panicked with no one nearby?

    So I asked my husband to shower with me. Not to fix me, just to be there.
    And he was.

    That’s what surviving looks like sometimes.

    I Still Worked—But It Wasn’t Easy

    I work from home, and I logged in like always.
    But today? I took a lot of breaks.
    I had to step away to breathe, to cry, to calm myself down.

    Every ping, every message, every task felt heavier than usual.
    But I did it. Slowly. Anxiously.
    And that still counts.

    This is what a high functioning anxiety day looks like for me:
    Smiling on the outside.
    Fighting for calm on the inside.

    I’m Not Lazy. I’m Overwhelmed.

    Some people will never understand this kind of anxiety.
    But if you’re reading this, I know you do.

    You know what it’s like to be afraid of your own body.
    To second-guess every twinge, every tight breath, every heart flutter.
    To survive an entire day without anyone knowing you were in panic mode the whole time.

    If today was that kind of day for you too—this post is for you.

    You’re not dramatic.
    You’re not weak.
    You’re just doing your best with a brain that never shuts up.

  • Healing Anxiety: The Comfort of Familiar Sounds

    Healing Anxiety: The Comfort of Familiar Sounds

    The Science Behind Familiar Comforts and Calming Sounds

    ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This post includes discussion of anxiety, emotional overwhelm, and self-soothing behaviors.
    📌 Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or doctor. This blog reflects my personal experience living with anxiety and includes publicly available information from credible sources.

    When I’m anxious, I don’t want surprises.
    I don’t want loud or bright or unexpected.
    I want something I already know — like a favorite show I’ve seen a hundred times.
    I want rain, soft clouds, and quiet air.
    And you know what? That’s when my anxiety feels the lowest.

    If you’re nodding along right now — you’re not broken.
    You’re regulating.

    📺 Why People with Anxiety Rewatch the Same Shows

    Rewatching the same show or movie over and over again is a comfort strategy that many of us use — especially on high-anxiety days.

    It’s not laziness or avoidance. It’s protection.

    “When life is uncertain and unpredictable, rewatching familiar shows can provide a sense of control, comfort, and emotional safety.”
    — Dr. Pamela Rutledge, Media Psychologist (TIME Magazine)

    Here’s why it works:

    • Predictability lowers stress. You already know what happens — no plot twists, no emotional spikes.
    • Cognitive ease: Your brain doesn’t have to process anything new. It relaxes.
    • Emotional safety: These shows become soft, safe places to land when the world feels overwhelming.

    “Familiar media provides a predictable and controllable experience, which is key for people whose lives or minds feel chaotic.”
    — Dr. Krystine Batcho, Professor of Psychology (NBC News)

    So if you’re rewatching The Office, Grey’s Anatomy, SpongeBob, or whatever makes you feel okay — you’re not weird.
    You’re coping. And it’s valid.

    🌧️ Why Rain, Clouds, and Gloomy Weather Calm Anxiety

    Me personally? When it rains, my body relaxes.
    Cloudy skies and the sound of raindrops do something no amount of caffeine-free tea or journaling can touch.

    This isn’t just preference — it’s physiological.

    “Rain sounds activate the parasympathetic nervous system — the part of the body that slows the heart rate and promotes relaxation.”
    — Dr. Kelley Kitley, Licensed Clinical Social Worker (Healthline)

    Here’s what’s happening:

    • Rain mimics white noise, blocking out harsh sounds and creating a rhythmic, soothing backdrop.
    • Cloud cover reduces light, which softens visual input for overstimulated brains.
    • There’s no pressure to go out and perform — the world slows down, and your nervous system follows.

    “Rain helps people with anxiety because it provides a sensory cue that’s safe and steady — something the brain can anchor to.”
    — Dr. Chloe Carmichael, Clinical Psychologist (Verywell Mind)

    💬 Why This Matters

    If you’ve ever:

    • Rewatched your comfort show for the 12th time this month
    • Felt deeply relaxed on a rainy day
    • Preferred quiet routines over new stimulation

    You are not alone. And you are not broken.
    Your brain is trying to regulate chaos in the best way it knows how.

    🧠 It’s Not “Just in Your Head” — It’s Your Nervous System

    Your nervous system craves safety.
    Familiar shows, rainy days, soft sounds — these are nervous system cues that say:

    “You’re okay. You’re safe. You can breathe.”

    And that? That’s healing in its own right.

    — Shanice, Anxiety Momster

    💜 Create Your Own Calm Corner

    Grab my free Peace Over Panic Journal + Tracker to help you reflect, reset, and document what works best for your anxiety.

    👉 Download it here

    Includes:

    • Daily check-ins
    • Coping tool logs
    • Mood charts
    • Grounding rituals
    • Space for grace, not perfection

  • How I Knew It Was Time to Seek Support for My Mental Health

    How I Knew It Was Time to Seek Support for My Mental Health

    ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This post discusses mental health, emotional overwhelm, and the experience of asking for help.
    📌 Disclaimer: I am not a mental health professional. This is a personal story based on my lived experience. If you’re struggling, please speak with a licensed professional or reach out for support.

    I didn’t wake up that morning planning to fall apart.

    I was just trying to get through the day — like always.
    Kids to care for. Work to do. My mind racing while my body screamed “slow down.”
    I felt like I was drowning in everything, but I still kept pushing. Because that’s what I do.

    Until I couldn’t anymore.

    I sat on the edge of the bed, frozen.
    My heart was pounding. My chest was tight. My thoughts were spiraling.
    And for the first time, I said out loud:

    “I can’t do this alone anymore.”

    That was the moment everything shifted.
    That was the day I realized I needed help.

    Not just a nap or a reset.
    Real help. Real support. Real space to not always be the strong one.

    For so long, I convinced myself that asking for help meant I was weak.
    That I wasn’t doing enough. That I was failing — as a mom, a wife, a woman.

    But the truth is:
    Asking for help was the bravest damn thing I’ve ever done.

    It was messy.
    Filling out therapy intake forms made me cry.
    Saying “I need support” out loud felt like ripping open a wound.
    But I did it anyway. And I’m proud I did.

    If you’ve ever struggled to open up about your anxiety, especially around your kids, I shared more about how we approach that in our home here:
    👉 Breaking the Stigma: How I Talk to My Kids About Anxiety and Panic Attacks

    It’s not just about me anymore.
    My kids see me learning how to cope. They see me reaching for calm instead of collapsing.
    And that matters.

    Since asking for help, I’ve learned how to:

    • Recognize my triggers
    • Talk about what I’m feeling without shame
    • Take breaks before I break
    • Breathe before I spiral

    And no — I’m not healed. But I’m healing.
    That’s a big difference.

    If you’re reading this wondering if you need help too, let me say this clearly:

    You don’t have to hit rock bottom to ask for support.
    You just have to be honest with yourself.

    Whether it’s therapy, medication, journaling, community, or just admitting “I’m not okay” — help is out there. And you deserve it.

    The day I asked for help was the day I started becoming myself again.

    — Shanice, Anxiety Momster

    If this post helped you, please share it, leave a comment, subscribe, or just send it to someone who needs to hear it today. You never know who’s silently struggling.

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