Anxiety Momster

Category: Panic disorder

  • Today Was a High Functioning Anxiety Day—But I Still Showed Up

    Today Was a High Functioning Anxiety Day—But I Still Showed Up

    ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This post discusses health anxiety, panic, and fear around daily tasks.
    📌 Disclaimer: This blog shares personal experiences and is not intended to replace professional medical advice.

    Today was a high functioning anxiety day.

    That means I still did things—I got out of bed, I worked from home, I showered—but it felt like dragging myself through quicksand the whole time.

    I woke up already in panic mode.
    My chest felt off.
    My thoughts were racing.
    And the first thing I did?
    Check my heart rate. Again. And again. And again.

    Scared to Shower, But I Didn’t Want to Be Alone

    Even something as “simple” as a shower felt scary today.
    What if I got lightheaded?
    What if I panicked with no one nearby?

    So I asked my husband to shower with me. Not to fix me, just to be there.
    And he was.

    That’s what surviving looks like sometimes.

    I Still Worked—But It Wasn’t Easy

    I work from home, and I logged in like always.
    But today? I took a lot of breaks.
    I had to step away to breathe, to cry, to calm myself down.

    Every ping, every message, every task felt heavier than usual.
    But I did it. Slowly. Anxiously.
    And that still counts.

    This is what a high functioning anxiety day looks like for me:
    Smiling on the outside.
    Fighting for calm on the inside.

    I’m Not Lazy. I’m Overwhelmed.

    Some people will never understand this kind of anxiety.
    But if you’re reading this, I know you do.

    You know what it’s like to be afraid of your own body.
    To second-guess every twinge, every tight breath, every heart flutter.
    To survive an entire day without anyone knowing you were in panic mode the whole time.

    If today was that kind of day for you too—this post is for you.

    You’re not dramatic.
    You’re not weak.
    You’re just doing your best with a brain that never shuts up.

  • Healing Anxiety: The Comfort of Familiar Sounds

    Healing Anxiety: The Comfort of Familiar Sounds

    The Science Behind Familiar Comforts and Calming Sounds

    ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This post includes discussion of anxiety, emotional overwhelm, and self-soothing behaviors.
    📌 Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or doctor. This blog reflects my personal experience living with anxiety and includes publicly available information from credible sources.

    When I’m anxious, I don’t want surprises.
    I don’t want loud or bright or unexpected.
    I want something I already know — like a favorite show I’ve seen a hundred times.
    I want rain, soft clouds, and quiet air.
    And you know what? That’s when my anxiety feels the lowest.

    If you’re nodding along right now — you’re not broken.
    You’re regulating.

    📺 Why People with Anxiety Rewatch the Same Shows

    Rewatching the same show or movie over and over again is a comfort strategy that many of us use — especially on high-anxiety days.

    It’s not laziness or avoidance. It’s protection.

    “When life is uncertain and unpredictable, rewatching familiar shows can provide a sense of control, comfort, and emotional safety.”
    — Dr. Pamela Rutledge, Media Psychologist (TIME Magazine)

    Here’s why it works:

    • Predictability lowers stress. You already know what happens — no plot twists, no emotional spikes.
    • Cognitive ease: Your brain doesn’t have to process anything new. It relaxes.
    • Emotional safety: These shows become soft, safe places to land when the world feels overwhelming.

    “Familiar media provides a predictable and controllable experience, which is key for people whose lives or minds feel chaotic.”
    — Dr. Krystine Batcho, Professor of Psychology (NBC News)

    So if you’re rewatching The Office, Grey’s Anatomy, SpongeBob, or whatever makes you feel okay — you’re not weird.
    You’re coping. And it’s valid.

    🌧️ Why Rain, Clouds, and Gloomy Weather Calm Anxiety

    Me personally? When it rains, my body relaxes.
    Cloudy skies and the sound of raindrops do something no amount of caffeine-free tea or journaling can touch.

    This isn’t just preference — it’s physiological.

    “Rain sounds activate the parasympathetic nervous system — the part of the body that slows the heart rate and promotes relaxation.”
    — Dr. Kelley Kitley, Licensed Clinical Social Worker (Healthline)

    Here’s what’s happening:

    • Rain mimics white noise, blocking out harsh sounds and creating a rhythmic, soothing backdrop.
    • Cloud cover reduces light, which softens visual input for overstimulated brains.
    • There’s no pressure to go out and perform — the world slows down, and your nervous system follows.

    “Rain helps people with anxiety because it provides a sensory cue that’s safe and steady — something the brain can anchor to.”
    — Dr. Chloe Carmichael, Clinical Psychologist (Verywell Mind)

    💬 Why This Matters

    If you’ve ever:

    • Rewatched your comfort show for the 12th time this month
    • Felt deeply relaxed on a rainy day
    • Preferred quiet routines over new stimulation

    You are not alone. And you are not broken.
    Your brain is trying to regulate chaos in the best way it knows how.

    🧠 It’s Not “Just in Your Head” — It’s Your Nervous System

    Your nervous system craves safety.
    Familiar shows, rainy days, soft sounds — these are nervous system cues that say:

    “You’re okay. You’re safe. You can breathe.”

    And that? That’s healing in its own right.

    — Shanice, Anxiety Momster

    💜 Create Your Own Calm Corner

    Grab my free Peace Over Panic Journal + Tracker to help you reflect, reset, and document what works best for your anxiety.

    👉 Download it here

    Includes:

    • Daily check-ins
    • Coping tool logs
    • Mood charts
    • Grounding rituals
    • Space for grace, not perfection
  • How I Knew It Was Time to Seek Support for My Mental Health

    How I Knew It Was Time to Seek Support for My Mental Health

    ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This post discusses mental health, emotional overwhelm, and the experience of asking for help.
    📌 Disclaimer: I am not a mental health professional. This is a personal story based on my lived experience. If you’re struggling, please speak with a licensed professional or reach out for support.

    I didn’t wake up that morning planning to fall apart.

    I was just trying to get through the day — like always.
    Kids to care for. Work to do. My mind racing while my body screamed “slow down.”
    I felt like I was drowning in everything, but I still kept pushing. Because that’s what I do.

    Until I couldn’t anymore.

    I sat on the edge of the bed, frozen.
    My heart was pounding. My chest was tight. My thoughts were spiraling.
    And for the first time, I said out loud:

    “I can’t do this alone anymore.”

    That was the moment everything shifted.
    That was the day I realized I needed help.

    Not just a nap or a reset.
    Real help. Real support. Real space to not always be the strong one.

    For so long, I convinced myself that asking for help meant I was weak.
    That I wasn’t doing enough. That I was failing — as a mom, a wife, a woman.

    But the truth is:
    Asking for help was the bravest damn thing I’ve ever done.

    It was messy.
    Filling out therapy intake forms made me cry.
    Saying “I need support” out loud felt like ripping open a wound.
    But I did it anyway. And I’m proud I did.

    If you’ve ever struggled to open up about your anxiety, especially around your kids, I shared more about how we approach that in our home here:
    👉 Breaking the Stigma: How I Talk to My Kids About Anxiety and Panic Attacks

    It’s not just about me anymore.
    My kids see me learning how to cope. They see me reaching for calm instead of collapsing.
    And that matters.

    Since asking for help, I’ve learned how to:

    • Recognize my triggers
    • Talk about what I’m feeling without shame
    • Take breaks before I break
    • Breathe before I spiral

    And no — I’m not healed. But I’m healing.
    That’s a big difference.

    If you’re reading this wondering if you need help too, let me say this clearly:

    You don’t have to hit rock bottom to ask for support.
    You just have to be honest with yourself.

    Whether it’s therapy, medication, journaling, community, or just admitting “I’m not okay” — help is out there. And you deserve it.

    The day I asked for help was the day I started becoming myself again.

    — Shanice, Anxiety Momster

    If this post helped you, please share it, leave a comment, subscribe, or just send it to someone who needs to hear it today. You never know who’s silently struggling.